amand_r

Hello all, it's been a while, so I shall UPDATE BY NUMBERS.

1. Cookies have been awesome. I am taking a break. I have many new things that I want to try, but they aren't going to ship well in this heat. That said, if you ever want some cookies, feel free to drop me a line. I am now making shit on demand. Except the chocolate caramel shortbread. They are a pain in the ass.

2. Kidlet is done with preschool! Well, for this year at least. I have embarrassing video, but I am too lazy to upload it.

3. My computer died recently! It was horrible. I was trying to log on, and it kept telling me my user profile couldn't load properly. After shedding bitter tears, I managed to save all my files from safe mode onto an external drive, and then I had to reinstall the OS from factory settings. Strange how everything runs now. On the other hand, there's something cleansing about getting a fresh start.

4. I have been reading a great deal. You can find my reading on Goodreads. Right now I'm reading about the monster of Florence.

5. I MADE PASTA FROM SCRATCH. IT WAS AWESOME.

6. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS AWESOME? HOT DOGS.

7. Here is the story of how I am bitter:

One day I started watching Wire in the Blood. I watched 2 eps and then forgot. Then a month later I was all, “I should check out Wire in the Blood”, and lo, I already had. I resumed my watching. BY THE WAY the special with Tony in Texas was the best thing ever. I lolled so hard. Anyway, I got to the end of season 6 when [spoiler] and it ends with [spoiler] and Then I click ed the “Next” button on the Netflix streaming screen.

Nothing happened. I looked and saw they only had up to season six. Never mind, I will download the torrent somewhere.

That's right, in my head I had convinced myself that there are 8 seasons.

Oh wait, no, that's Waking the Dead.

It became increasingly difficult to locate the season seven torrent No one had it. I was going to do a shot out to my flist. Then I decided to see when it was released. So I checked wikipedia.

Boy, am I bitter. WHAT A FUCKING WAY TO END. NOT TWIN PEAKS EPIC, BUT JESUS.

8. I read the new Sookie Stackhouse. Yeah.

9. I had so many things to say! I have no idea where they went.

10. Lastly, I have a novella/thing coming out in October, and the publisher, Candlemark and Gleam was nice enough to send me promo postcard things to distribute. I was thinking of handwriting some short short stories and offering to send them to people for postage. Would anyone be interested? Want one? I guess if you sent me five bucks, I could send you the card and a half a dozen cookies. Or something.

Postage has gone up package wise, by the way. That's how they get ya.

Off to read more about excising vaginas.

I don't think it's news to anyone that I'm an up and down person. I have mood swings, and until recently I have always gone with the flow. Back in February the anger end of those issues started to hinder relationships, so I tried to locate causes and tracking on a calendar, and lo and behold they were cyclical, like another cycle I have, go fig. Knowing that it was "that time of the month" for my anger issues had helped me to control that. That's fine.

( Here's where everything went pear shaped. )

1. wherepiesdie is a comm dedicated to a rewatching and discussion of Twin Peaks in its entirety. We plan on doing 2 episodes a week. In the new year. If you've never seen before, or if you're in the mood for a rewatch and a discussion as you go, please check it out.

2. THE BEST SNACK EVER. I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE ALL SNOBBY ABOUT YOUR JUNK FOOD, THESE ARE THE BOMB:

GOLDEN GRAHAMS S'MORES.

A) GREASE 13x9x2" PAN

B) HEAT ¾ C. LIGHT CORN SYRUP, 3TBSP BUTTER, 11.5 oz MILK CHOCOLATE TO BOILING IN A DOUBLE BOILER. REMOVE FROM HEAT AND STIR IN VANILLA.

C) POUR 12 oz. GOLDEN GRAHAMS INTO A LARGE BOWL, TOSS WITH MELTED MIXTURE UNTIL COATED.

D) STIR IN 3 C. MINI MARSHMALLOWS ON CUP AT A TIME.

E) PRESS INTO PAN WITH THE BACK OF A BUTTERED SPOON. LET STAND 1 HOUR. ENJOY THE BLISS.

3. My dad doesn't read my lj, so it's safe to tell the abridged tale of the Snuggie.

( Goddamn muther effing sonofabitch. )

4. EVERYONE HAVE AN AWESOME CRIMMAS. I WOULD MAKE YOU A PLAYLIST OF WHAT I AM GOING TO BE LISTENING TO, BUT IT WILL PROBABLY BE ALL OTIS AND OLD LIZ PHAIR. I'M NOT EVEN GETTING DRUNK.

SOME MIGHT SAY I HAVE NO CRIMMAS SPIRIT. THEY MIGHT BE RIGHT.

EAT SOMETHING DANGEROUS FOR ME.

I haven't updated my wish list in ages. I rarely ask for things. I mean, what's the point? Things don't make you happy (this is pointed at you Nicholas H. Cruentum. Those boxers would not have made you happy. After you washed them.), and you know. Blah blah. But I figured I'd sit down and think about it, because once I asked for a hookah and I got one.

( Nothing I say here is really srs. )

1. I HAD THIS QUEER FEELING IN MY SOUL, AS IF THOUSANDS OF, NO MILLIONS OF SOULS CRIED OUT IN TERROR AND WERE SUDDENLY SILENCED, AND I REALISED THAT I DIDN'T HAVE AN LJ ENTRY.

2. delicfcd, who is not on my flist (that should probably be remedied) has topped me in the BEST LINKAGE OF PHOTO AND QUOTE EVAR when she pulled Stephenson's Snowcrash together which a photo of the Spetsnaz. FUCK ME, PEOPLE. THAT SHIT IS FUCKED UP.

3. All my pants are too big, they fall down low on my hips and then you can't see my lovely ass. I think it's time for new pants.

4. I'm starting to run. Well, walk really really really fast. It's fun. When I do it, MY HANDS ARE LIKE BLADES. And then the ladies in the park flye from me (that sometime me did seeke). Vivi loves it: she loves to run and run and run, screaming, "OKLAHOMA OKLAHOMA OKLAHOMA OKLAHOMA OKLAHOMA." If you get that movie reference I'll write you a drabble of your choice right in the comments.

I need to see that movie again.

5. I BOOKED MY HOTEL ROOM AT HUB3. I WAS ALL, "SOOOOO CHEAP!" AND THEN I REALISED IT WAS POUNDS. DAMN YOU. Well, actually, compared to when I stayed in Toronto or Chicago, it's not bad at all. I even sprang for the breakfast thing, because I sense that will be the only time I actually eat something that isn't fermented and comes in a glass or bottle.

6. BLUE-BLEU!!!!! AGENT JOHNSON IS GOING TO BE THERE! If Alice was going to be there too, I would be all, "GET YOUR ASS ON A PLANE. THE COE GODS (ON)DEMAND IT!"

7. So Foxy called me this morning from the GDL panel and I got to be in one of those surreal moments when you hear everything going on, but it was basically GDL mumbling in his adorable welsh vowels. I might have squeed. Then 30 minutes later Lifty called me and started his PC Andy routine, but I was laughing so hard I could only make out that he was asking me something about breasts. Lifty-licious, the reason that I was a total dweeb on the phone was that I bowled over by the sexy.

8. Also last night, Foxinator called and we chatted, and I think I might have agreed to be her roomie for D*C next year, WHICH IS AWESOME. PLAN FOR THE NEXT ONE WHILE YOU'RE STILL AT THE CURRENT ONE. She wants to actually stay at a Con hotel next time, and I can't blame her. OTOH, she is staying at the weekend HQ of Black Gay Pride, so that is pretty cool, too.

9. I washed my face, but it still feels scrotty.

10. OMG lionessblack and I started writing our Big Bang this week, on Sunday, I think. WE ARE NOW AT 8,000+ WORDS, AND THEY ARE ALL FUCKING BRILLIANT (except for that one word, the typo.) I LOLED SO EFFING HARD. MUPPETS TAKE MANHATTAN, PEOPLE.

11. SOMETIMES IS FEEL LIKE I SHOULD GIVE UP AND JUST PERMANENTLY LOCK DOWN MY CAPSLOCK KEY. PEOPLE. I LOVE THE CAPSLOCK.

1. This morning, my coffee, TO WHICH I DO NOT ADD SWEETENER, tastes reminiscently of Sugar Smacks. It's my fault. I let that goddamn Dig Em frog in here last night and now everything tastes a little bit like shitty cereal.

2. So, I was "fixing" a laptop for my dad, who boned his and had to reinstall Windows XP and all that shit. What he did was run the install disk, and then he couldn't get online. So here I am, fucking about with all kinds of shit in the settings, deep into the BOWELS of the computer that requires commands prompts and the recitation of the Holy Writ of Microsoft or something, and then I'm like, "Well, if I could dial up from the laptop, I bet I could download the drivers you're missing." Off to my house comes the lappy.

( The Ballad of Driver Quest Idiocy )

3. How did I miss this? Let Me Borrow That Top. No Jack, no.

Also? I have to admit that I found the editing in this charming: Ianto Jones's Diary

4. I am pleased to sat that ask_captainjack's Red Nose Day Charity fundraiser exceeded our fundraising goal of £50, and is now at £75. That's sweet. The page is here: where some people left nice comments. I particularly like the one that mentions that A_CJ caused the greatest OTP of all: soda/computer screen. Apparently Comic Relief says that with that amount, we can help an African family open a small business, which I am all for, because I like entrepreneurship. And also, people owning shit.

OTHER THINGS THAT I AM FOR INCLUDE:

1. Puppies
2. Cheese
3. FREE STEAK
4. I'M THE BOSS.

THINGS THAT I AM NOT FOR INCLUDE:

1. My screwed up knee.
2. My messy desk.
3. NOT FREE STEAK.
4. ( Mrs. Goodbee's Scary Eyes )

5. It's a week until…what do we call it now? Aunt Flow comes to town? Riding the cotton pony? I dunno. Anyway. My boobs hurt, and I have to hold them when I run down the stairs. It's like bikini cops in slow motion. No. Anyway, none of this happened to me before the baby, so I get to blame her for my PMS woes. ::sad panda face::

6. That is all. You may go about your day now.