amand_r: (the asian persuasion)
Hello all, it's been a while, so I shall UPDATE BY NUMBERS.

1. Cookies have been awesome. I am taking a break. I have many new things that I want to try, but they aren't going to ship well in this heat. That said, if you ever want some cookies, feel free to drop me a line. I am now making shit on demand. Except the chocolate caramel shortbread. They are a pain in the ass.

2. Kidlet is done with preschool! Well, for this year at least. I have embarrassing video, but I am too lazy to upload it.

3. My computer died recently! It was horrible. I was trying to log on, and it kept telling me my user profile couldn't load properly. After shedding bitter tears, I managed to save all my files from safe mode onto an external drive, and then I had to reinstall the OS from factory settings. Strange how everything runs now. On the other hand, there's something cleansing about getting a fresh start.

4. I have been reading a great deal. You can find my reading on Goodreads. Right now I'm reading about the monster of Florence.

5. I MADE PASTA FROM SCRATCH. IT WAS AWESOME.

6. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS AWESOME? HOT DOGS.

7. Here is the story of how I am bitter:

One day I started watching Wire in the Blood. I watched 2 eps and then forgot. Then a month later I was all, “I should check out Wire in the Blood”, and lo, I already had. I resumed my watching. BY THE WAY the special with Tony in Texas was the best thing ever. I lolled so hard. Anyway, I got to the end of season 6 when [spoiler] and it ends with [spoiler] and Then I click ed the “Next” button on the Netflix streaming screen.

Nothing happened. I looked and saw they only had up to season six. Never mind, I will download the torrent somewhere.

That's right, in my head I had convinced myself that there are 8 seasons.

Oh wait, no, that's Waking the Dead.

It became increasingly difficult to locate the season seven torrent No one had it. I was going to do a shot out to my flist. Then I decided to see when it was released. So I checked wikipedia.

Boy, am I bitter. WHAT A FUCKING WAY TO END. NOT TWIN PEAKS EPIC, BUT JESUS.

8. I read the new Sookie Stackhouse. Yeah.

9. I had so many things to say! I have no idea where they went.

10. Lastly, I have a novella/thing coming out in October, and the publisher, Candlemark and Gleam was nice enough to send me promo postcard things to distribute. I was thinking of handwriting some short short stories and offering to send them to people for postage. Would anyone be interested? Want one? I guess if you sent me five bucks, I could send you the card and a half a dozen cookies. Or something.

Postage has gone up package wise, by the way. That's how they get ya.

Off to read more about excising vaginas.
amand_r: (doctor who/HARRIET JONES)
1. Guess what you can't wipe up with a Clorox wet nap? Baking Soda. Nope, if spills on the floor and you go to wipe it up, but you just end up pushing it around on the lino. Then when you give up and try to scoop as much of it as you can see, you realize you have just thinned it to an invisible coating of baking soda. And then for days when you step in that area in your socks, you get a squidgy feeling as you slide around in it. Then you realize that you put this in your body: A POWDER THAT CANNOT BE DISSOLVED AND PICKED UP BY THE LIQUID IN A CHLOROX WIPE. (Spider has since informed me that I can clean it with vinegar. Thanks, babe.)

2. Squeezing lemons when your hands are chapped to the point of cracking is not the smartest idea in the universe, lightbulb. However, if you put your fingers in baggies and put a rubber band at the base of each finger, you get to race the clock to see if the pain from cracked skin or the pain from listing feeling in the fingers will make you stop first.

The answer is NEITHER BECAUSE I AM THAT BADASS.

3. Me: Viv, are you done pooping?
Her: No. I got to chillax.
Me: What?
Her: Just chillax, mama.

4. I drove behind a Bronco II that had this on a paper taped to the back windshield: I WILLNOT SPEED JUST TO MAKE YOU HAPPY. I SLOW DOWN FOR TAILGATERS.

5. I have many thoughts on Rhianna's S&M. Some of them are not good. Most of them are nonchalant, which as we all know, is the opposite of chalant. Not to be confused with chalet, or Swiss Chalet, which makes me think of Swiss steak, which makes me want steak. Or those onions that come on top of steak sometimes. When you make a bowl of sautéed onions and mushrooms to put on steak and meats, that's called the kitty. I eat the kitty on fried sweetbreads. Now I want to watch Josie and the Pussycats. Dujour means swiss steak!

6. I DID A THING. )
amand_r: (YOUR MOM)
I HAD SEX WITH GARETH DAVID LLOYD ON A SINK AT DRAGON*CON AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY MANICURE:



Yes, this sums up my whole D*C experience nicely. )

That was my big fat D*C exp. Seriously, few panels, lots of booze, tonnes of food, great people, EXCELLENT CONVERSATIONS, and a renewed sense of writing. I WILL WRITE THAT FPREG. IT WILL BE AWESOME.

OH AND I THINK I MIGHT HAVE A SEASON TO AIR THIS FALL.

Oh, and Jack and Ianto's post-it D*C adventure )

BUT FOR NOW, my dad is out of surgery, and I'm waiting to hear how he is, and I have plans to make biscotti with cabernet cocoa powder, and possibly some cupcakes.

I dreamt about biscotti last night.

I made a list of shit to do divided by pages: on page per category, house, work, online, general, errands, etc. IT'S NINE PAGES LONG.

See ya'll on the flip side.

EDIT: I bought their Netherworld Blend and the Reanimator Blend. The latter is great. Haven't tasted the firmer. Go there and browse the teas and coffees.
amand_r: (tw/ianto makes my ass look great)
1. GAH.

ME: Blah blah blah.
THERAPIST: Blah blah BLAH blah. ::eyebrows::
ME: Blah Blah. ::wavey hands::
THERAPIST: AH HAH. THERE IT IS!
ME: Whut?
THERAPIST: There's your problem! Your issue!
ME: ::smacks head:: GODDAMMIT.
THERAPIST: Ha ha ha! Found it! NOW YOUR REAL THERAPY CAN BEGIN.
ME: SHITBEARS!
THERAPIST: YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE IT.
ME: SHUT UP, RAFIKI.
THERAPIST: Same time next week?
ME: Yes please.


2. MBABB IS AT 137,350. That sounds impressive until you realise that on 6/27 I had 125,242, so this month I have only done 12,108 on it. SHITBEARS.

3. I'm going to start taking my prozac at night and see if that doesn't cure my exhaustion during the day.

4. Because I can't leave well enough alone, the current ep I'm working on:

They both jumped into the SUV and Maggie started the car, turning the heater on full blast. It hadn't been off long enough to have completely cooled down and the warmth spread across Lois's hose-covered legs. Bliss.

"Lo," Maggie said, tucking the tickets into the sun visor, "please tell me you packed denims or some other heavy work trousers."

Lois shrugged. "I have slacks and a pair of coveralls."

Maggie sighed. "Okay, we have a little bit of time, and the Quay is open." She pointed to the hulking shopping arena that boasted hundreds of outlet stores. "Lois Habiba, you need to dress for a mess."

"Dress for a mess," Lois deadpanned as she pulled her shit coffee from the cup-holder and took a sip. Absence did not make the tongue grow fonder. Maggie started the SUV and pulled out of the Wightlink lot.

"I bet they have a Starbucks," Maggie sang.

Lois gestured at the windshield with the cup. "Sally forth, my good woman."


That is all.

ETA: IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME.
amand_r: (waaaaaaaa)
1. FUCKING SHARK HELL WEEK, DAY THREE: Not really pissed. More like, resigned to futility. LOL. I said it aloud—LOL. YAY!

2. Pondering how some OTC medicines for already embarrassing ailments have even more embarrassing names: Beano, Gas-X, Preparation H (which I guess is not embarrassing unless you know what it is for).

Me: Me, seriously, who likes taking PREPARATION H to the checkout aisle?
Mum: Well, there's always Anusol, that's not embar…oh wait.
Me: THAT WILL NEVER STOP BEING FUNNY.

3. Got a statement for a dental visit from a year ago from my old insurance company this weekend. Read THIS IS NOT A BILL and shrugged. Then today got a bill from my dentist saying "Sorry this is late! We just got the thing from the insurance company! LOL!" for $82. While I am told this might violate HIPPA laws, I'm just going to pay it. Still, just another reminder of the grinding wheels of humanity.

4. I'm still tired.

The rest under a cut: Dexter, writing fanfiction, why continuity errors doesn't bother me, crack, random shoes, disabling comments, when you fall out of love with fandom, and mutual fic masturbation. Oh, and Catherine Parr. And poop. )

That's it. Someone get me a fucking bear claw.
amand_r: (west wing/mrs landingham)
So, yet another story finished. I keep this up, I'll be finished with all my obligations by…next Sunday. BRILLIANT! WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG?

Let's do the countdown, shall we? )

I feel I have accomplished a lot today and I haven't even slept yet. Sleep gives you cancer, man, everybody knows that.
amand_r: (the asian persuasion)
I spent yesterday procrastinating and writing and finishing my crimmas cards, which, if I do say so myself, are pretty fucking funny. I'll post them sometime closer to the holiday, because they need to be shared.

But I get ahead of myself! Today! UPDATE! BY! NUMBERS! )

That is all. There aren't the droids you're looking for. There aren't the droids we're looking for. You can go about your business. You can go about your business. Move along. Move along.
amand_r: (Default)
I haven't updated my wish list in ages. I rarely ask for things. I mean, what's the point? Things don't make you happy (this is pointed at you Nicholas H. Cruentum. Those boxers would not have made you happy. After you washed them.), and you know. Blah blah. But I figured I'd sit down and think about it, because once I asked for a hookah and I got one.

Nothing I say here is really srs. )
amand_r: (Default)
In the interests of...myself, actually, this journal is going fannish only. All entries that are not fic have been taken private. All remaining and future entries in this journal will consist of fanfiction only.

I am sorry for the inconvenience.

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amand_r

December 2020

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