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amand_rREQUIREMENT TO READ THIS ENTRY: BEFORE YOU COMMENCE, PRESS PLAY ON THE FOLLOWING VIDEO:
1. SADISTIC PENIS HEAD WAND. 'NUFF SAID. I WONDER IF IT COMES WITH A COMPLIMENTARY Z-PAC FOR THE RAGING UTI YOU'RE GOING TO GET WHEN YOU LEAVE THIS IN FOR AN EXTENDED PERIOD OF TIME.
2. Last night in a fit of realisation,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
amonitrate and I created ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
wherepiesdie, a comm we are going to use to discuss Twin Peaks as we re-watch it from square one. We plan on watching 2 eps per week come January. If you're interested, throw it on your flist now and we'll post a viewing schedule later in the month. That might also give you time to find the pilot, which is not included in the DVD box sets and therefore has to be PIRATED from somewhere.
I cannot fucking wait.
3. Tomorrow is the kidlet's birthday. This time in 2006, I was already pretty uncomfortable, lying in the hospital and watching episodes of Buffy on the telly while I waited for that shitty cardboard drug thing to work, which it never did. Then later someone brought me Krispy Kreme donuts, which I ate and then booted. My iron was so low they gave me fluids and I swelled impossibly. Later in the evening around midnight they finally gave me a painkiller, pitocin, broke my water, and then I watched the Crimmas episode of The Boondocks whilst stoned off my gourd. It was the best episode evar. Better than when I watched the first episode of The Venture Brothers whilst under the influence and then managed to convince myself that I had made it up, because the airing of the pilot and the airing of the series was separated by about two years. Imagine my surprise to soberly watch it on TV and realise that no, I hadn't hallucinated or embellished it at all
Good times, good times.
4. I might be reading the new Merry Gentry book. I'm only on chapter three, and already I'm rolling my eyes at her writing, but at least everyone still has their clothes on. Though said clothes have been described in full detail. Did you ever notice that? Mary Sue authors LOVE describing the clothes. It's a sure-fire sign of an inexperienced writer for me, unless we're describing something REALLY unusual, like a dress with panniers (panniers? I forget), or a complicated leather harness with a sounding rod. In fact, when I wrote my horrible Vampire Chronicles self insert when I was fifteen, I took great glee in describing all the tights and poet shirts and shit like that (look it was the early nineties, not a good time for fashion. Case in point: Color Me Badd, or any picture of John Barrowman out of costume from 1990 to 1994.).
ANYWAY, yeah, I'm only on chapter three because while I could probably rip through that like the flimsy bodice of a two dollar whore, I feel guilty reading anything when I have so much writing on my plate. Hahaahahah I WILL FINISH EVERYTHING TODAY. YES I SHALL.
5. That MUTHERFUCKING MEME OF AWESOME. Srsly, it's like some sort of surrealist generator: Go to your Calendar and find the first entry for each month of 2009. Post the first line of it in your journal, and that's your "Year In Review."
I have decided to exclude fic posting, because while indicative of what I have been doing this year, it's boring as fuck.
January: My quest for Torchwood S1 and 2 and DW s4 HAS COME TO NAUGHT ON THE INTERWEBS.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: That was the beginning of the end. Look how young I was. Young and stupid. And had never heard of sounding.
February: So I signed up for all frickin' 14 days of14valentines, so here is the first contribution.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: THE PAGE OFWANDS STUPID.
March: WATCHED wedding video
idrunk
fucking tiantyu.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: QUEEN OF CUPS. AHAAHAHAHA
April: I was going to write something about Tianyu, since this is the anniversary of, well, you know.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: This entry is significant because it is effing funny, particularly the part where I try to convince Arsenic about the time we did peyote, and we discovered that everything in the universe is an extension of Captain Jack's peen.
May: Amand-r: I wish I remembered the Japanese you taught me. CAKE-DESU.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I dunno. The rest of the conversation is pretty much the way my year has been:
Arsenicjade: what Japanese? I only know like four or five words
Amand-r: I don't know. Something about killing someone. something from Gundam? We were lying there on the sofa and you taught me how to say it. But I've forgot it.
Arsenicjade: omae o korus
Amand-r: what does it mean? "I would like some head."
Arsenicjade: I am going to kill you
that too. it's very flexible
Amand-r: ::shrug:: Same diff.
Arsenicjade: see above
Amand-r: lolrskates.
June: Hello, my ladies and gents! It has been a few days since my lastmurder update by numbers.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: Funny how this is the first entry that addresses the updates, and this is in fact the first month I have had an entry for every day. EVERY DAY. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!!
July: WARNING, some of this shit was left over from yesterday, when I didn't really post an update. So it might be out of date. Like 60-year-old Coco Chanel.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I don't really know what 60-year-old Coco Chanel would smell like. I bet Coco Chanel wore Chanel. Wouldn't it have been funny if she wore Shalimar? Does Calving Klein wear CK One? OMG DOES RALPH LAUREN WEAR POLO? I
There should be an expose on this.
August: Last night I was away from the gchat screen for a while.
Amand-r: Sorry, I was voting in wiad.
Lionessvalenti: That's all right. :) I know that takes a thousand years to do. You've forgotten Ianto, haven't you?
Amand-r: Who's Ianto?
Lionessvalenti: Hehehe
September: 1. So I had this dream that I had been rehired by my old school district, and when I went for orientation, there were a bunch of new teachers in my department, along with the old ones.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: As this was the only teaching related dream I had this year, funny that I had it on September first, when I traditionally would have started teaching, if I were employed. It was a shit dream, and in the dream I quite my job. Twice. I don't think my subconscious can get any clearer than that. Unless it, you know, wants to supply some dreams of me and SG in a shower or something.
I HAVE A CONFESSION: I have a horrible body image. Like I'm self conscious about my body, especially naked. Does anyone else kind of, not fantasize about sexual acts with extremely attractive people because they think they look bad? My first thought at the above sentence about the shower was, "Oh god, I haven't shaved my legs in three days." WTF, BRAIN? IT'S A FANTASY.
October: 1. No no no, you don't understand. I LOVE Chali2na. I LOVE HIM.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: RETAIN THE FRESHNESS, BITCHES.
November: Hi everyone. This is Amand-r with a special message.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I posted the poly. Yeah.
December: I spent yesterday procrastinating and writing and finishing my crimmas cards, which, if I do say so myself, are pretty fucking funny.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: That is where we are! Woooooo! CRIMMAS CARDS, which is an improvement from last year where I sent out three and they were store bought ones.
Later this month I have a post on what you all mean to me and something about the Grinch and his walnut heart and something about eggnog and Windex and it's curative properties. Then we all grill a lamb on the lawn. I might be getting fandom confused with My Big Fat Greek Wedding. ::shrug:: Whatever. I make you lamb.
I can't believe I actually have a list of lj-entry subjects.
You know what I want to see again? The Syrian Bride.
1. SADISTIC PENIS HEAD WAND. 'NUFF SAID. I WONDER IF IT COMES WITH A COMPLIMENTARY Z-PAC FOR THE RAGING UTI YOU'RE GOING TO GET WHEN YOU LEAVE THIS IN FOR AN EXTENDED PERIOD OF TIME.
2. Last night in a fit of realisation,
amonitrate and I created wherepiesdie, a comm we are going to use to discuss Twin Peaks as we re-watch it from square one. We plan on watching 2 eps per week come January. If you're interested, throw it on your flist now and we'll post a viewing schedule later in the month. That might also give you time to find the pilot, which is not included in the DVD box sets and therefore has to be PIRATED from somewhere.I cannot fucking wait.
3. Tomorrow is the kidlet's birthday. This time in 2006, I was already pretty uncomfortable, lying in the hospital and watching episodes of Buffy on the telly while I waited for that shitty cardboard drug thing to work, which it never did. Then later someone brought me Krispy Kreme donuts, which I ate and then booted. My iron was so low they gave me fluids and I swelled impossibly. Later in the evening around midnight they finally gave me a painkiller, pitocin, broke my water, and then I watched the Crimmas episode of The Boondocks whilst stoned off my gourd. It was the best episode evar. Better than when I watched the first episode of The Venture Brothers whilst under the influence and then managed to convince myself that I had made it up, because the airing of the pilot and the airing of the series was separated by about two years. Imagine my surprise to soberly watch it on TV and realise that no, I hadn't hallucinated or embellished it at all
Good times, good times.
4. I might be reading the new Merry Gentry book. I'm only on chapter three, and already I'm rolling my eyes at her writing, but at least everyone still has their clothes on. Though said clothes have been described in full detail. Did you ever notice that? Mary Sue authors LOVE describing the clothes. It's a sure-fire sign of an inexperienced writer for me, unless we're describing something REALLY unusual, like a dress with panniers (panniers? I forget), or a complicated leather harness with a sounding rod. In fact, when I wrote my horrible Vampire Chronicles self insert when I was fifteen, I took great glee in describing all the tights and poet shirts and shit like that (look it was the early nineties, not a good time for fashion. Case in point: Color Me Badd, or any picture of John Barrowman out of costume from 1990 to 1994.).
ANYWAY, yeah, I'm only on chapter three because while I could probably rip through that like the flimsy bodice of a two dollar whore, I feel guilty reading anything when I have so much writing on my plate. Hahaahahah I WILL FINISH EVERYTHING TODAY. YES I SHALL.
5. That MUTHERFUCKING MEME OF AWESOME. Srsly, it's like some sort of surrealist generator: Go to your Calendar and find the first entry for each month of 2009. Post the first line of it in your journal, and that's your "Year In Review."
I have decided to exclude fic posting, because while indicative of what I have been doing this year, it's boring as fuck.
January: My quest for Torchwood S1 and 2 and DW s4 HAS COME TO NAUGHT ON THE INTERWEBS.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: That was the beginning of the end. Look how young I was. Young and stupid. And had never heard of sounding.
February: So I signed up for all frickin' 14 days of
14valentines, so here is the first contribution.MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: THE PAGE OF
March: WATCHED wedding video
idrunk
fucking tiantyu.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: QUEEN OF CUPS. AHAAHAHAHA
April: I was going to write something about Tianyu, since this is the anniversary of, well, you know.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: This entry is significant because it is effing funny, particularly the part where I try to convince Arsenic about the time we did peyote, and we discovered that everything in the universe is an extension of Captain Jack's peen.
May: Amand-r: I wish I remembered the Japanese you taught me. CAKE-DESU.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I dunno. The rest of the conversation is pretty much the way my year has been:
Arsenicjade: what Japanese? I only know like four or five words
Amand-r: I don't know. Something about killing someone. something from Gundam? We were lying there on the sofa and you taught me how to say it. But I've forgot it.
Arsenicjade: omae o korus
Amand-r: what does it mean? "I would like some head."
Arsenicjade: I am going to kill you
that too. it's very flexible
Amand-r: ::shrug:: Same diff.
Arsenicjade: see above
Amand-r: lolrskates.
June: Hello, my ladies and gents! It has been a few days since my last
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: Funny how this is the first entry that addresses the updates, and this is in fact the first month I have had an entry for every day. EVERY DAY. HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!!
July: WARNING, some of this shit was left over from yesterday, when I didn't really post an update. So it might be out of date. Like 60-year-old Coco Chanel.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I don't really know what 60-year-old Coco Chanel would smell like. I bet Coco Chanel wore Chanel. Wouldn't it have been funny if she wore Shalimar? Does Calving Klein wear CK One? OMG DOES RALPH LAUREN WEAR POLO? I
There should be an expose on this.
August: Last night I was away from the gchat screen for a while.
Amand-r: Sorry, I was voting in wiad.
Lionessvalenti: That's all right. :) I know that takes a thousand years to do. You've forgotten Ianto, haven't you?
Amand-r: Who's Ianto?
Lionessvalenti: Hehehe
September: 1. So I had this dream that I had been rehired by my old school district, and when I went for orientation, there were a bunch of new teachers in my department, along with the old ones.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: As this was the only teaching related dream I had this year, funny that I had it on September first, when I traditionally would have started teaching, if I were employed. It was a shit dream, and in the dream I quite my job. Twice. I don't think my subconscious can get any clearer than that. Unless it, you know, wants to supply some dreams of me and SG in a shower or something.
I HAVE A CONFESSION: I have a horrible body image. Like I'm self conscious about my body, especially naked. Does anyone else kind of, not fantasize about sexual acts with extremely attractive people because they think they look bad? My first thought at the above sentence about the shower was, "Oh god, I haven't shaved my legs in three days." WTF, BRAIN? IT'S A FANTASY.
October: 1. No no no, you don't understand. I LOVE Chali2na. I LOVE HIM.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: RETAIN THE FRESHNESS, BITCHES.
November: Hi everyone. This is Amand-r with a special message.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: I posted the poly. Yeah.
December: I spent yesterday procrastinating and writing and finishing my crimmas cards, which, if I do say so myself, are pretty fucking funny.
MAGIC 8-BALL SEZ: That is where we are! Woooooo! CRIMMAS CARDS, which is an improvement from last year where I sent out three and they were store bought ones.
Later this month I have a post on what you all mean to me and something about the Grinch and his walnut heart and something about eggnog and Windex and it's curative properties. Then we all grill a lamb on the lawn. I might be getting fandom confused with My Big Fat Greek Wedding. ::shrug:: Whatever. I make you lamb.
I can't believe I actually have a list of lj-entry subjects.
You know what I want to see again? The Syrian Bride.
Tags:
- arsenic,
- birthdays,
- blogging annat,
- books,
- cc pick up that guitar and talk to me,
- crack,
- daleks are all up in my shit,
- disturbing revelations,
- fandom,
- i am a shameless whore,
- i am awesome,
- i blame crue,
- i love everyone right now,
- i need a goddamn pop tart,
- i need an arsenic tag,
- inappropriate laughter,
- jack harkness's cock,
- links to stuff,
- meme crappage,
- merry gentry,
- my undying love of chali 2na,
- nostalgia,
- people i'd fuck,
- personal wiggety-wack,
- sex toys,
- teaching,
- the ??--let me show you it,
- the awesome--let me show you it,
- twin peaks,
- videos,
- viola,
- writing fanfic
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 06:02 pm (UTC)Chapter 3 and they're still dressed? Isn't that a record or something for her?
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 06:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 08:05 pm (UTC)But, a murder scene? Does that mean there's a plot? Should I be spending money on this book?
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 08:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 08:08 pm (UTC)(ok... really dont know you well enough to call you that, but I haven't had coffee either so that's what came out.)
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 08:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 08:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 09:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 11:44 pm (UTC)And give V an extra hug for the strange lady who write on your lj. LoL
Renee
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 12:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 01:27 am (UTC)also, ow.
as far as body image goes: if I fantasize, I'm usually fantasizing that I"m someone else, so that probably applies.
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 01:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:26 am (UTC)Give the kidlet lots of birthday hugs!
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:40 am (UTC)For some reason this is reminding me of Baman Piderman videos. Have you seen them?
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:42 am (UTC)I haven't seen!
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 04:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 04:02 am (UTC)In other news, I would totally have my first thought be, "fucking hell, I need to wax. And lose ten pounds."
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 04:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 04:36 am (UTC)WTF?
Never in my wildest imaginings would I have come up with that. At least not for recreational purposes on the receiving end.
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 06:28 am (UTC)ALSO, I JUST REALIZED I ONLY MET YOU IN JUNE! JUNE!
no subject
Date: 2009-12-12 03:04 pm (UTC)