When I grow up, I want to be Hudson Hawk.

[amand_r]

WARNING, some of this shit was left over from yesterday, when I didn't really post an update. So it might be out of date. Like 60 year old Coco Chanel.



1. What do we think of stories that have no dialogue? How about stories that only have one line of dialogue at the end of each scene? Too pretentious? How about ::shifty eyes:: polyamorous fic? Five way domestic? Hot tub sex Gwen/Rhys/another, possibly Jack or Ianto? Lisa/Jack/Ianto? Yes? AU? POLYAMORY? Is parapalegic sex sexy? I ask that with love. (I SAID OUT OF DATE. THAT LAST QUESTION STILL STANDS. So do the first three.)

2. I AM A MEMBER OF TORCHWOOD 5. For all you people who didn't know that. I just roll that way. I am thinking our theme song should be this. Or this.

3. I finally did that fucking personality test thing, after three FAILED TRIES, and I am a freewheeling…uh….psychopath or something. So hard to remember when it's not in front of me. It's too hard to click the mouse keys. All this smiling makes my face ache.

4. 192 times in 30 seconds! AW SHIT! AND THAT WAS AT 10:56 PM!



5. In the past few days, I seem to be getting an influxcapacitor of friends! Welcome peeps! Honest to god, this is how it works in our LJ relationship here, like if you were Eminem and you were rapping: I just say whatever I want, to whoever I want, whenever I want, wherever I want, however I want. Incidentally, that's pretty much how I regard this journal, too. Talk to me, hos. But if you make me cry, I'll, uh, probably whine about it and YOU'LL HAVE TO READ ABOUT IT HERE! AND IT WON'T BE BEHIND A CUT. Think about THAT.

6. Harry Potter fandom: has anyone ever written a story in which all the bumper quotes to the scenes were Wrock lyrics? Because in listening to Draco & the Malfoy's "My Dad is Rich," I was suddenly overcome with the hilarity of using the lyrics to open a Harry/Draco story. Not that I'd write that.

7. Amand-r: Why are you still up? Why am i still up?
Kel: we are 2 crazy peas in a hot-taser pod?
Amand-r: awwwww sheeit. i'm gonna kick neifile's ass with taser coffee brewing.
Kel: hahaha!
Amand-r: naw. she'll kill me. she has three graduate degrees! I just have the one degree! BUT MY COFFEE FU IS STRONG. I LEARNED AT THE FEET OF JUAN FUCKING VALDEZ.

8.

a. Opening scene: now I know what Bill's fangs are for—chewing scenery.
b. I forgot how much I live Dr. Ludwig
Eric: It is always a pleasure doing business with you.
Dr. Ludwig: Fuck off!
c. PAM. OH PAM. "Pam is extremely lazy. But loyal."
Eric: And Pam? They were great pumps.
d. THERE IS NOTHING GOOD ABOUT MARIANNE'S SOUP.
e. That last scene in the car with Bill and Sookie? OMG A MILLION FANFIC WRITERS COULD HAVE DONE THAT SCENE BETTER.
f. WHAT THE SHIT, DAPHNE?

RANDOM CHARACTER THINGS:

BILL/ERIC: They are so gay 4 each other. Really. Where's the Bill/Sookie/Eric fic? Fuck that, where's the Bill/Eric/Pam fic?
JASON: Okay, I was starting to like his whole thing, and I really loved his speech. I liked how both he and Sookie had some eye opening thoughts this week, Jason about how vamps are probably better, and Sookie about how they're worse. That was actually pretty good, and this thinky thought makes up for the fact that in my notebook I have scribbled: "JASON STACKHOUSE, TOPLESS—I WOULD. I REALLY WOULD."
TERRY BELLEFLEUR: I ♥ you so much. WHERE IS THE TERRY FIC? HUH, PEOPLES? DO I HAVE TO WRITE IT MYSELF? BECAUSE I REALLY CAN'T RIGHT NOW.
JESSICA: Gets the best use of Marcy Playground ever. This things with her and Hoyt? OH HOYT. I LOVE YOU HOYT. The whole thing is cute as a fucking bloody button,, and I mean bloody as in blood, as in there will be some.
TARA: I liked Tara a lot this episode. I really liked her scene with Marianne in the kitchen, and the realization that she makes about the party, though I'm still not sure why it bothered her so much. Thoughts?

Quoteables:
HOYT: You should try the chicken fried steak. It's like a chicken and a steak got together and made a baby. A crispy…baby.
REV. NEWLIN: Sarah doesn't whip out her pudding for just anyone.

Hoyt: You get to live here. Must be pretty cool.
Jessica: Not really. It’s filled with is creepy stuff. And he makes me sleep in a hole.
Hoyt: Yeah. My momma keeps her doll collection in my closet.

Comments

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

Hot tub sex Gwen/Rhys/another, possibly Jack or Ianto? Lisa/Jack/Ianto? Yes?

Yup. Pretty much. Write some more porn, please.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

JESUS, MY IE ISN'T WORKING. HOW CAN I FUNCTION TODAY WITHOUT IT? FUCK!

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

Firefox?

Google Chrome?

Slate tablet + crayon?

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

OH SHITBEARS.

[luscious-words.livejournal.com]

How about ::shifty eyes:: polyamorous fic? Five way domestic? Hot tub sex Gwen/Rhys/another, possibly Jack or Ianto? Lisa/Jack/Ianto? Yes? AU? POLYAMORY? Is parapalegic sex sexy?
1. Hell to the yeah on the polyamory!!!
2. See above answer to the five way domestic.
3. See above above answer to the hot tub config.
4. See...are you getting the picture with my answers?
Last question - See answer to #1. :)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Good to know.

[luscious-words.livejournal.com]

I'm all for threesomes, foursomes, moresomes in fanfic and original stories. (Does it show that I like smut? *g* A girl can always hope, right?)

[neifile7.livejournal.com]

Paraplegic sex, done right, for the absolute freaking win. I hope you know the work of John Callahan? A must if you're going to go there.

If you can make coffee with a taser, then you pwn my overeducated ass. I concede. Otherwise, the duelling caffetiere are on.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Of course I tase the coffee! That's where you get the extra jolt!

I have not seen it, but i'm more concerned with medical issues right now. Jokes later.

[neifile7.livejournal.com]

Great thing about Callahan -- he doesn't gloss over the real medical stuff, just incorporates it with humor. Really, go have a look; lots of stuff archived online.

Okay, now I have to come up with my own coffee-tasing technique. Plainly I will be no kind of TW5 butler if I can't.

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

1. I'm a dialogue whore, so I gotta have it. Yes, I love beautifully-crafted narrative, but it damn well better be exquistely-structured, propel the plot forward, and not tell tell tell. Too often I see paragraphs of narrative that would be so much more entertaining and interesting if broken down into dialogue. When I see that, I just think a writer is being a bit lazy. Harsh, but true. I am evil like that. Polyamory? Sure! You know there is a poly big bang out there...I signed up for it, though I am wondering why. My friend amproof made me.

2. Snark.
3. Still think my results are questionable.
4. Your caffeine level for today is: Moderate - Chipper & Perky (I've had one coffee, one ice tea--what the heck have you HAD today, woman?)
5. I've made alot of new friends lately too. Now, 2/3rds of my flist are TW peeps. Blows me away. HOW did that happen? WHAT did Nick drag me into?

The rest--shake my head. Sookie...omg if there is slash out there for Sookie, I've got to let the author know. Srsly, she would love it, she is so totally whacked. LOL. *was there when she got the news she sold the tv rights oh so long ago and am on mystery list with her lol*



3.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

1. I agree with what you say, and that is why this is killing me, because I LOVE WHAT I HAVE. I LOVE IT. And I don't know what I'm doing. But dialogue isn't the only way to show, and I do a lot of showing though physical actions (he turns his wedding band on his finger, she slams her chair into the doorframe) and I don't get how a lack of dialogue is taking away from that. you know? It's the quiet of the narrative that makes the dialogue important then, and that's what's important, because words are important even when they're not.

Oh no. I just launched into my inner monologue about Jepthah's daughter.

Sookie slash, It has to be out there. I fangirl Charlaine like mad.

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

1. I don't want just dialogue of course--that is screenwriting lol--but a balance thrills me the most, engages the Dear Reader's emotions and throws them into grabbing for Kleenex. I do think, if you are preferring more narrative, that is fine but don't cheat yourself out on truly wielding it fiercely to bring your Dear Readers to their knees.

Take this sentence from your fic:

She tells him, as they drive to Cardiff, that she's afraid that if they hadn't been married, that he would have left her. Ianto has to pull the car over on the carriageway and pull her into his lap, because of all of the things she could have said, that is the saddest and most untrue thing.

This one sentence--how I would love to SEE that entire bit, not just in one sentence, but expanded, lengthened, deepened. POW POW POW! Sure, it is personal preference, but even if the only line of dialogue was her fear, the impact of his reaction via his inner thought would be that much more emotional, that much POW, as that is huge. Pulling a disabled woman onto his lap in the car would be hard, would trigger MORE possibilities for reactions on his part, either verbally-expressed or internally.

Little treasures like this one sentence would have far more impact on Dear Reader...it is emotionally-wrangling, this one little bit, and would be a great opportunity for you to really whip Dear Reader into an emotional state, as well as give that opportunity show (Show!) just how hard in this one way dealing with Lisa's disability truly is. It would also give Ianto a small showcase to show (SHOW!) extra tenderness through his actions, helping her to his lap, burying his face in her hair, tightening his arms around her in that intimate way that he has always before, and still does, because he loves her. We would then be emotionally-invested along with Ianto into the scene.

I wonder if your mind sometimes just races ahead really fast...you ARE a very fast person lol...and it would help after you get a scene down and off of your flying fingers if you went back and looked for these little treasures that you can expand, yup add some dialogue (doesn't have to be alot--less CAN be more!) and wrestle to the ground. I think your story would be loved all the more for it.

That make sense? Feel free to drop-kick me--seriously! Again--these are just my thoughts, things that have been hammered into me over the years. :)

[moljn.livejournal.com]

I'm all for any fic done well (may or may not read it, but for it nonetheless). As for no dialogue, if it's not long-ass paragraphs of introspection, that's a plus. And it's not, so good on that. The bit you posted seemed more like the intro to the real story, a the-story-so-far. I'm trying to think of fanfic that used the same matter-of-fact(?) style well. One Rose/Ten II had long stretches of it, as I recall, with key scenes played out with dialogue and in more detail.

It seems like it'd be a longish story, and I think the narrative would distance the reader too much if you didn't go in and make it more immediate here and there (if that makes sense). Not sure how well it lends itself to (hot) sex scenes either, if you're going for that, but that could be because it's not my pairing. If key-scenes-dialogue doesn't do it for you, maybe you could intersperse it with short dialogue-only parts. A bit gimmicky, though, I guess.

Hm, that's a lot of ifs.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the dialogue slicing makes it...funny looking. I'm trying an alternate version of the same scene, and seeing how it works. I'll probably slap that up here as well.

The beginning doesn't really do it justice in the terms of pacing, because I want to get them to Cardiff. Like all of this is set up, you know, and then it slows. I dunno. We'll see. When I think if show, don't tell, what I think if is the whole spewing of internal thought processes, not the lack of dialogue or the use of a matter of fact narrative, because actions are telling in that. They're just narrative actions. Shit, that was what I was trying to say earlier.

I fail at communications.

[moljn.livejournal.com]

Or I fail at reading; I think you lost me halfway through the second paragraph.

Think we agree that you're showing-not-telling plenty in the bit you posted, though. Sometimes, as one essay once said, "He turned on the lamp," is perfectly fine writing. He doesn't need to reach for, find and pull the string. And if we were to take show-don't-tell far enough, we'd have mimes, not writers. Would make for a very different kind of porn. Less, too, probably.

That was a bit of a tangent. I'd be interested in seeing the new version, though. And okay, I get what you mean about the pacing. It wouldn't be much of a story if everything happened so fast. I still imagine the style to be distancing, if stuck to throughout, but it's hard to say for sure without reading the story.

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

Too much reading for after a shit day at work. Words don't make sense. Except for - TASER COFFEE??!! What is this? I love tasers. I love coffee. Maybe you do have the mad skillz after all!

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

How else do you heat the coffee to give it that extra zing?

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

Well I was heating it with my mind, but that's broken now. Bring on the Taser action!

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

i like dialogue

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that seems to be the consensus.

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

HOWEVER
some stories work better without (also, you are a writery writer who can make it work)

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

I don't think anything is too pretentious for fic. The first second person story I ever read in any media was yours, in fic, so there. Fic is where we play, right?

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

HUSH YOU. I AM PRETENTIOUS. OR PREHENSILE. OR PRECOGNITIVE.

THERE ARE TOO MANY PRE WORDS IN ENGLISH.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

Precognitive fic would be AWESOME. Like. You write fic to find out what happens! Wait, that's pretty much how my fic writing works already.

So it would be like WRITING THE FUTURE.

This should be a pilot tv show. We've already had the guy who gets the next day's paper. We need the chick who writes the future every time she tries to type an email.