look man

[amand_r]

I AM NOT SAYING I'M A BNF. AND I WOULD NEVER ASK YOU TO BUY ME AN IPOD OR A LAPTOP OR SOMETHING.

BUT LOOK PEOPLE. LOOK AT IT.



IS THERE ANYTHING MORE WORTHY OF ME? I MEAN, THE ONLY THING THAT COULD POSSIBLY MAKE THIS MORE "ME" IS IF IT WAS STUDDED WITH PLUSH SHARKS.

BULLSHIT TIME:

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH FIC I COULD WRITE IF I HAD THIS CHAIR? (RE: NONE) OH MY GOD I WOULD WRITE A THIRTY CHAPTER EPIC JACK/IANTO ROMANCE IN SPACE WITH NO WATERSPORTS, BUT SOME BONDAGE AND A JOHN HART CAMEO, AND THEN THERE'D BE A BIG FOURWAY WITH THE FACE OF BOE (IF YOU FELT LIKE IT.). AND THEN IN THE END, JACK WOULD TELL IANTO HE LOVED HIM AND THEN THEY'D GO BACK IN TIME AND SAVE IANTO FROM THE ALIEN FART AND THEN THEY'D GET MARRIED AND HAVE LIKE FIVE KIDS (MPREG OR NOT, YOUR CHOICE), AND THEN LIKE, UHM, IANTO WOULD GET TARDIS-PROBED AND END UP IMMORTAL TOO, AND HE AND JACK WOULD LIVE TOGETHER FOREVER AND END UP TWO HEADS IN A JAR, AND WHEN THEY WANTED TO HAVE SEX AN ACOLYTE WOULD JUST PICK UP THE JAR AND SHAKE IT VIGOROUSLY.

HOLY SHIT I WOULD LIKE A CIGARETTE. BUT NOT ON MY PLUSH PANDA CHAIR.

END BS PART.

BUT SERIOUSLY, AS ANYONE EVER DONE TO IANTO IN A FIC WHAT THE TARDIS DID TO JACK? WOULDN'T THAT JUST...SOLVE EVERYTHING? AND THEN THEY'D BE LIKE...THE ODD COUPLE FOR ALL ETERNITY, AND THEY'D SPLIT UP AND COME BACK TOGETHER EVERY 500 YEARS OR SO, LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE THAT LIVES ON OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE HOUSE, IF BY "HOUSE" I MEANT UNIVERSE.

I READ THAT ONCE.

ALSO, UHM, ALICE IN WONDERLAND IS A FUCKED BOOK.

Comments

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

OMG no more immortals.

You NEED this chair. I totally saw people making this chair on TV last week, though. Was it Rachael Ray? Oprah? IDK, but a celebrity was supergluing stuffies to a chair.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

FUCK THAT SHIT. IF IT WAS ON OPRAH THEN I DON'T WANT IT.

ALSO, YOU MEAN TO SAY THERE'S A CHAIR UNDER THERE? HOW LAME IS THAT! I THOUGHT I WAS SEWN TOGETHER PLUSH ANIMALS, AS BEFITS A QUEEN OF NARNIA. OH WAIT.

If I had infinite dollahs

[itcamefromjapan.livejournal.com]

I WOULDN'T SEND YOU LIPGLOSS, BUT I WOULD SEND YOU THE FUCK OUT OF THAT CHAIR.

Re: If I had infinite dollahs

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

HAAAHAHAAAHAHAH I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE FUCK I WOULD PUT THAT CHAIR.




I WOULD MAKE THE FUCK ROOM.

[ericadawn16.livejournal.com]

Where is this thing for sale?

Also, I have definitely seen that in fics. I also think it's very plausible that repeated contact with Jack and Jack bringing him back to life, at least once, could have caused mutations in his body chemistry.

I also have seen where Ianto is secretly an immortal race and/or a Time Lord.

It's nice.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

i HAVE SEEN iANTO AS AN IMMORTAL IN ALL THOSE WAYS BUT THE WHOLE "iANTO BEING IDENTICAL TO JACK" IMMORTAL.

i HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THIS CHAIR IS FOR SALE. i BLAME KEL REILEY.

[snufflesdbear.livejournal.com]

If I has $75,000 I would buy it for you. for reals. dats a lots of fanfic to writes.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

OMG IT'S 75 K? IS IT MADE FROM REAL PANDAS?

[specialj67.livejournal.com]

I do enjoy that it seems say: I don't give a fuck about function--I'm a motherfucking panda chair, bitch! You want me.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I KNOW! IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE LEGS I WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IT WAS!

[heddychaa.livejournal.com]

IF I SEND YOU LIPGLOSS WILL YOU WRITE YOUR JACK/IANTO BOTH IMMORTAL ON-AGAIN-OFF-AGAIN RELATIONSHIP FOREVER FIC WITH ME? NO?

[thepyromanical1.livejournal.com]

WHERE DO I SEND MY CHECK?

[azarias.livejournal.com]

Okay, Jack/Ianto done in the style of Galadriel/Celeborn will be my go-to-sleep thought tonight. If you know what I mean.

[blue-fjords.livejournal.com]

Keep selling your cookies, and once you reach $85,000, you get the panda chair!

[joanwilder.livejournal.com]

I left you a little over two hours ago and you were fine. NOW YOU'RE...EATING THE SHROOMS THAT ALICE DID OMG. The chair, it's just...HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

[joanwilder.livejournal.com]

You know *glances from shiftily from side to side* it wouldn't be hard at all to make that chair....

[huesiemama.livejournal.com]

Dear gods, honey. You just broke my brain with the Ianto fixed by the TARDIS like Jack.

And that panda-san chair is the shit. I would read the hell out of panda-san fic.

[mia-ugly.livejournal.com]

If I had money you would own this chair in a number of days (not weeks) and all I would demand would be some good 'ol HP fic. Is that so much to ask? Remember the old times? You kids grow up so fast...

[bethcarielle.livejournal.com]

You must wear this while sitting in the chair: http://www.cushzilla.com/shop/img/productimages/m/cushi-panda-costume-pjs-01.jpg

*points to icon*

[behindblue-eyes.livejournal.com]

Yes, Alice in Wonderland is fucked up. Especially when you consider the Lewis Carroll was trying to get into a little girl's pants when he wrote it.

I think this is the plot that every Janto fic aspires to in one way or another. EXCEPT FOR SHAKEN NOT STIRRED JAR SEX HOLY CRAP THAT IS AWESOME HILARITY.

And I can't help but think that the little plush panda noses would make it...interesting to sit on. (Do I need to use my porn voice to make the innuendo clear there or should I just wink a lot?) *wink nudge wink WINK*

[djin7.livejournal.com]

CREEPY CHAIR IS CREEPY. LOOKS LIKE IT ATE BABY PANDA SOULS.


NOW THIS IS A WORTHY WRITING PANDA CHAIR :

[snufflesdbear.livejournal.com]

OHHHHHHH!!! That's more like the one I made! Only mine was fake fur and sat on the ground (it was a kidlette chair).

[arsenicjade.livejournal.com]

Dude. We need this for the Empornium. This is the sekrit to our future success.

[reddevilpoes.livejournal.com]

OMG, That is the wierdest shit! Can you actually SIT in that thing? And still feel good about yourself, the poor critters...?
I love your view in 'face of Boe' sex! Do write it!!! With nurse Hame!

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

i haven't seen a shark one, but here's a bear one for Vstroyer: http://i381.photobucket.com/albums/oo251/roopeshtalwar/chairs/teddy-bear-chair.jpg

I WANT THE GATOR ONE!

[firynze.livejournal.com]

I...I...WHUT?!

That is...wow. That chair. I can't stop staring.

Also, if you think the BOOK is fucked, go watch the movie from the 80s. The one that has Sammy Davis Jr as the Caterpillar. I have never quite recovered.

[madder-rose.livejournal.com]

That's a chair? It looks like someone tried to torture a hive of pandas!


(YOU NEED THIS. CLEARLY)

MOAR CHAIRZ

[dorothy1901]

AMAND-R, THERE IS AN ALLIGATOR CHAIR! THE CHAIRS COULD GO TO WAR, JUST LIKE PIRATES AND NINJAS!

[chamilet]

I seriously had no idea that was a chair.

Sounds like teachwriteslash's stories. The Jack and Immortal!Ianto getting together every few 100 years and then moving on. Don't remember how Ianto became immortal though...and eventually I think they live in a triad with Twelve and have Time Lord babies.

[eldarwannabe.livejournal.com]

I think I have managed to terrify my roommate by falling out of my chair laughing so hard.

IT WAS THE PROMISE OF 30 CHAPTERS OF NO WATERSPORTS THAT SET ME OFF. AND THEN IT JUST WOULDN'T STOP, MUCH LIKE YOUR EPIC PROMISES.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

haaahahah THERE WOULD BE CUDDLING.