back to actual blogging and crap

[amand_r]

1. FUCK YEAH SHARKS has their own tribute to John Hughes.

2. DRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAA:

Me: (puts kid in bed)
Her: The bears?
Me: (piles every bear she owns on top of her torso) Yes?
Her: Bears?
Me: (looking at the pile) These are all the bears.
Her: (wailing) The beeeeeeeears!
Me: (O_o)
Her: (gibberish ending in "the bears")
Me: (moves a panda bear two inches closer to her face) Like this?
Her: Okay.

WTF, PEOPLE. I CANNOT WORK UNDER THESE CONDITIONS. I SAID RED M & Ms ONLY. (TOSSES FRUIT BASKET)

THE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEARS. (Imagine I sang that, Victoria de los Angeles style)

3. So last night I had a fandom playdate with azarias, who is awesome and lovely and has some of the most awesome ideas about DW and TW, and is friends with someone I know from a different fandom, therefore proving that we are a VERY SMALL COMMUNITY, no matter how far apart we seem. We met in a neutral location, just in case one or the other of us was crazy, and managed to eat a great Thai dinner around screams of, "WHAT THE FUCK WAS RUSTY THINKING?!" and "OH. MY. GOD. JB. NO." Then we went for coffee, which is a lot less complicated than it sounds, since Starbucks was right next door. But we sat outside and she sold me on The Authority again, and we talked about what a horrible ship Alan Moore/Tori Amos would be, and how Mark Millar needs to be bludgeoned a little bit.

Also, she has a Van Helsing fic she's working on THAT SHE SHOULD FINISH (yeah girl, I'm looking at you!). She listened to me blather on, and SHE EVEN LAUGHED AT MY JACK/JOHN SCAT FIC IDEA. BECAUSE IT IS AWESOME. Or because it made her nervous. Hrm.

We also think Kenneth Branaugh would be a great Thor, esp. if he'd more like Ultimates Thor.

4.

gypsylady: Top Five Inappropriate Responses.

1. Oh, I'm sorry, is she in a coma? (High Fidelity)
2. I like slappin' em. (Firefly)
3. It was like a meat party in my mouth! (Buffy)
4. Party in my eye socket and everyone's invited! (Buffy)
5. Listen to me, you cock guzzling thunder cunt! (Weeds)

kittiword: Top Five fics that had you walk away with a new perspective, whether it be canon/fanon perspective, life etc. Basically fics that really made you think.
I'm really bad at this, because I remember things for the wrong reasons, but I'm going to dig into my fannish history for hallmarks.

1. HIGHLANDER: Eng's Chaos Chronicles, which I am fairly sure I wouldn't be able to read now, were the first major fanfic that I ever read online, and it was massive. It reinvented Immortals, and where they came from, it redefined the lines of Duncan's sexuality, and it was so confusing at time that I had no idea what was going on, and at some point? I think Methos was taken to a stables and tied up and broken like the horse I the horse whisperer. Yeah, I dunno, but it changed the way I looked at fanfic, as in, "wow, this is huge. You can take canon and CHANGE it so much that it's like, not even canon anymore" (I believe we call those AUs now, but SHUT UP. I WAS YOUNG).

2. THE X-MEN (AND WHOLE MARVEL UNIVERSE, ACTUALLY): X-Manson, by Dr. Benway. I can't even tell you what the fic did to me. It's done in documentary format, and as it unfolds, you get the picture, through countless stories, eyewitness accounts and interviews of Charles Xavier as a Jim Jones/Charles Manson cult leader with a gristly agenda, and the thing is, it works Never once is it OOC, never once does it leave the realm of possibility. It's fucking disturbing and I think that anyone who loves the X-men universe should take it on, because it's one of those fics that pulls from ALL OVER THE MARVEL UNIVERSE, and if you're a nerd like I am, you squee when authors effectively use the cast of thousands.

3. HARRY POTTER: Fly-fishing for Beginners by Jay Tryfanstone. Jay has always been a eclectic writer, but this was the first of her that I read that changed the way I thought about addressing the viewer. I love narrator-viewer dialogue, but have seen very little of it done well (Gaston Leroux, I'm looking at you, you bastard). That made me stop to think about the way that I structure my fics, and the way that fanfic doesn't have to sacrifice quality (which I always knew, but sometimes have to be reminded of) just because it's, you know, fanfic. Srsly, I have to be reminded of that every now and then.

4. TORCHWOOD: Hi, I'm Captain Jack Harkness by Frostfire. This is actually fairly recent, but it makes the list because it's Jack/CHEWBACCA. Let me explain why this broke my world—it redefines sexy for me. Like, Okay, I'm not going to bang Chewbacca any time soon, and the fact of the matter is, BEFORE this fic, I didn't really wonder where little Wookies came from, etc etc. But Jack, Jack sees things, even things that aren't like him, and he sees their inherent…sensual value. And that is genuinely something I admire. I don't feel filthy or inappropriate by saying that there are aesthetic preferences, and then there are aesthetic preferences, and I would like to be more like Jack—open to everything, because I see the value in it for what it is, and not because I have developed biases against something over time..

The fic made me think about things that I find unattractive in the same sex and the opposite sex. Why don't I like body hair? Why can't I get over that? Body hair is sexy, on men and women. What else do I have trouble with that are simply parts of a person/creature/individual? Is there something actually wrong with that part, or do I just not like it? why don't I like it? Was I raised that way? Blah blah blah. I am sure you are all more enlightened than I, oh flist.

Jack fucks the Wookie. End of story.

5. I….I can't think of a five. :(

crowie: Top 5 on screen kisses!

1. Species: Natasha Henstridge and the other dude. The one who loses his head BECAUSE HER TONGUE POPS OUT THE BACK OF IT.
2. Torchwood: Jack/Ianto, TTLM. I AM EASY, AND IT LOOKS LIKE THEY ARE EATING EACH OTHER'S FACES.
3. The Office: Michael and Oscar have the most awkward kiss ever.
4. Interview With the Vampire: Louis/Claudia awkward kiss. Mmmmm
5. Every kiss Brian and Justin ever had on Queer as Folk, the American version.


5. FUCK YEAH NEIL PATRICK HARRIS is officially my favorite blog of the week.

6. I haven't seen Monsoon Wedding in years, but with the seemingly-constant rain and my daughter continuing to pick my neighbour's marigolds and being them to me (eep! sorry, neighbours!), I find myself thinking of the minor character of Dubey the wedding planner, who is a stressed out, rather socially awkward and yet obnoxious man who is jaded from planning so many weddings and yet never falling love himself. In the film, he falls for one of the servant girls, Alice, on sight. They spend most of the film never really talking, but they kind of make cow eyes at each other (or rather, he makes them at her), and I am stuck by the memory of him watching her from across the yard, and eating marigolds which, IIRC are supposed to settle the trembling heart. Aside from that meaning I know there are others, but that's an image Nair sticks me with, and Jesus, is it beautiful and wistful, and I kind of wish for it in some ways.

When I'm all romantic and not, like, writing scatfic.

Comments

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

Haha, I love the Jack/Chewbacca story.

Why don't I like body hair? Why can't I get over that? Body hair is sexy, on men and women. What else do I have trouble with that are simply parts of a person/creature/individual? Is there something actually wrong with that part, or do I just not like it? why don't I like it? Was I raised that way?

Um, cultural conditioning? Calvin Klein underwear ads? PrOn?

These things swing back and forth based on cultural ideals - the hair aesthetic, the body shape aesthetic, all of this stuff. Plus there's your personal choice when it comes to this, but I wonder if anyone 100 years ago even HAD much of a personal preference for hairlessness - you didn't see bare chests or bits in the media, so...

I really do not know.

There is probably a book about this. I'd like to read it.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I know tha it's actually cultural condition on some levels, especially for girls from an early age hairles legs and underarms are the preferred norm, as is trimming pubic hair (which is fucking ridic. all ya'll can bite me).

I like smooth legs and underarms, but I also like men hairless, which might be why I, uhm, hrm. Okay, my husband had very little body hair. He was Asian, and hrm. I have aesthetic tastes that run that way, sometimes (I embrace all sexy!), but he didn't have any body hair except under his arms and calves, and I think I got used to it. And then I see guys with like, arm hair and I'm all, WTF?

It's cultural or something. Someone tried to convince me that I was oppressed by the patriarchy once because of it, but that's farther than I want to delve. Plus I have heard that hairlessness in men is on the rise aesthetically.

Le sigh.

I'm trying to open up. Lie back. Think of the PRONS.

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

Well, you know, it shouldn't be something you have to EXPLAIN. You can just stick with people with less body hair.

I shaved my legs in 5TH GRADE. I was at my friend's house after school (oh the latchkey days) and we shaved our legs in the backyard with hose water and softsoap. :D

UNFORTUNATELY FOR ME I have dark hair and am not Asian (Eastern European, Dutch, English, whatever) and am therefore a human Chewbacca. THE MAINTENANCE.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I just like to be aware of why I don't like something, an I have to poke at it. Like tomatoes. I hate tomatoes, bu everyone I know LOVES them, so I think, maybe I am wrong. I used to hate tacos and now I love them. So every year I make myself eat tomatoes to see if I have changed my mind

I like salsa now, I guess that's got to count for something.

I just like to ask myself if I'm being unfair when I have aesthetic preferences. That's just me, and I'm okay with the fact that I like smooth legs (also YEAH, HELLO EUROPEAN DESCENT BODY HAIR. MAINTENANCE. IF I COULD GET THAT LASER HAIR REMOVAL THING I TOTES WOULD.), but all and I really hate having some person yell at me because I AM BEING OPPRESSED AND SHIT, which is probably why I think about it more than once.

Anyway, Jack/Chewbacca was hott.

I think my original premise was faulty. I think it's about beyond moving beyond physical packages. If you can love the outside, it makes you more willing to see the inherent value of the inside, because we're shallow creatures motivated by sight. I'm over generalising and still working on this theory, which I admit might be wrong.

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

Well, I don't know, so much.

We've all found someone very attractive who turned out to have a horrible personality. I can't accept a terrible person for a partner just because the person looks great.

I dated someone I met on the internets years ago and he probably wouldn't have been my initial physical type had we not connected there first. We weren't even looking for someone in THAT way. That's pretty common.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I don't think you can guarantee that things that come in packages that you find to be attractive will always be quality. I think it more about me not automatically finding something unattractive and therefore somehow less worthy of attention. I said it before-- I am totes shallow, and I'm trying to fix that in some ways.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

I dunno. I saw Alec Baldwin in ... I can't even remember the movie now. And his furry chest traumatized me forever. I think I repressed that movie, all except the haunting memory of Alec Baldwin's chest hair.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I think I'd be more traumatised by the Alec Baldwin factor.

[accioslash.livejournal.com]

Seriously, you need to have more children. Because you can't pay for entertainment like that.

Wow, those are some pretty intense top fives. Not a 'tell me your favorite lifesaver flavor' in the bunch.

3. HARRY POTTER: Fly-fishing for Beginners by Jay Tryfanstone.

Interesting choice. You know, I joke about not being remotely well-read and the truth is, I really don't care because of the few things I have read, I'm pretty convinced I'm not missing much. But Jay Tryfanstone is one of the few fan fic authors that make me re-think that belief. Because, with them, I know I'm missing something that I could really enjoy. And it's almost enough to make me want to slog through something I normally wouldn't just to enjoy their work more.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I like the pink flavour, whatever that is.

I would have more kids, but my sperm bank is closed.

Oh, I love Jay's stuff like burning. Her Highlander stuff was and is fantastic, and she, like a few other suthors, makes me want to read the source material. Unovis's "Rejoice" made me want to read Unlysseus, and man, is that a tall order.

[accioslash.livejournal.com]

Is that the cotton candy one? I was actually thinking of the five original flavors.

I really don't think I'm smart enough to truly 'get' Jay's writing. And that makes me sad. I actually picked up 'Captains Courageous' because of your Mom's latest fic. I may even read it. ;D

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I was thinking the pink ones were strawberry? Gah, nothing ever tastes like the flavours they're supposed to be.

I think really, that sometimes there are authors that we have to unpack with a critical reading, and that's rare in fanfic. I like those authors. I couldn't read them every day, but I like them. And when I haven't read anything like that for a while, I get out of shape and have to reread something of their a few ties before I get back into the swing of examining a text and not just reading a plot (or a porns!) for enjoyment.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

Sylvia Volk is like this for me. One of my favorite HL stories I don't really get at all.

[crowie.livejournal.com]

Oh that X-Men story. I read it fairly early on in my fannish life (as in hadn't read that much fic really) and it completely blew my mind. I loved it.

Had completely forgotten about it though so thanks for reminding me.

Although yeah, also re: the first fic you read. I had an extremely backwards entry into Highlander fandom. I read HL fic before I even saw a picture of any of the actors what then saw an ep of the show, and the first HL fic I read was, I think called Metamorphosis? or something like that. Anyway in it a girl has managed to decapitate Methos but his quickening took her over and he slowly shapes her body back into his while living with Duncan.

I er.. yeah. Took me a while to get a handle on what was going on. Then I saw actual eps and was completely a lost cause re: Methos and Peter Wingfield as Methos.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Haahahahhaa. I am glad that I saw the show first, but I actually hadn't seen all of it, and I was writing my first fic having never seen like the Dark Quickening eps and all that. I had to watch them on reruns on late night TV, and that was fortunate.

Honestly, if I could write like Benway, I'd be the happiest camper in the word. He just SAW THE WHOLE PICTURE and it was HORRIFYING. But brilliant.

[sanginmychains.livejournal.com]

OH yeah, the "you have not matched the exact picture in my head and now I shall FREAK OUT" freak out. It's an important cognitive stage -- they're imitators-memorizers at this stage, they see a pattern and imitate it as best as they know how. But it's a PITA to parent through. You want to just somehow communicate to them that it's all NOT A BIG DEAL, YEESH, but they can't hear it. So you try to hit that balance between not torturing them and not torturing yourself, modeling compassion and flexibility while also modeling resilience, and the whole thing has led to ME being the one to freak out more than once.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

::le sigh::

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

It was like a meat party in my mouth! (Buffy)

OH, Buffy, I need to rewatch you again, don't I?

I love that question about the fanfics that changed your perspective! God, I tried to read that story by Eng about nine times, and never could get what the hell was going on. I am totally bookmarking that X-Men fic to read.

rambly comment is rambly: but the thought of Alan MOore/Tori Amos is repulsive and fascinating.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

That fanfic question was hard, because I have a lot of fics I LIKE, but they haven't changed the way I look at fanfic as a whole, and that was what I was looking for, you know? In fact, I don't even have any fics that I have bookmarked from before March, because I lost all my bookmarks, and I just delicious as I go from now on, you know? So I had to sit here and actually trawl my brain, and that's hard. I wish my brain had delicious tags.

I think I might have to rewatch Buffy, too.

Also, Tori/Alan is the cannibal ship. Bloody gumdrops raining from the sky.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

BLOODY GUMDROPS RAINING FROM THE...

ew. also, pretty.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

YOU HAVE TO ADMIT THAT IN THE CONTEXT, IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

It totally does.

They sorta. Belong together? But not. It's odd and scary.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

i THINK THEY WOULD HAVE SEX ONCE AND THEN ONE OF THEM WOULD KILL THE OTHER LIKE THE PRAYING MANTIS.

[amonitrate.livejournal.com]

i vote for Tori. It would be fitting.

[hanuueshe.livejournal.com]

DUDE, Neil Patrick Harris was at my school this summer. And I was not. ;_;

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

SUCK.

[hanuueshe.livejournal.com]

FAIL.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

>:(

Bryn Mawr, right?

[hanuueshe.livejournal.com]

Yeah...

On the plus side, when I go back it'll still sekritly be Hogwarts. It'll just also be NPHless.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Maybe he left his unicorn there for you!

[hanuueshe.livejournal.com]

THAT WOULD BE AWESOME!

Maybe it would even get rid of the kamikaze deer.

[melissa2u.livejournal.com]

LMV has a dozen or so koalas. Up until two years or so ago, she'd sleep with a different one each night. The hard part was she expected me to use the koala's name when I said goodnights.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Haahahaha. Last night I had to give her a hug. THEN a kiss, THEN butterfly kisses. THEN eskimo kisses. Jesus, the bedtime routine is like a Japanese Tea Ceremony.

[melissa2u.livejournal.com]

I miss those days. Kids are great :)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Kids make me all warm and fuzzy, with their 'naked tiems nao' and sticky fingers.