i didn't make julienne fries!

[amand_r]

1. Pornsultant Bob is on Doctor Who Season 2:

Pornsultant Bob: K9 is really cute.
Amand-r: Oh Jesus. K-9. I read a Jack/K-9 somewhere.
Pornsultant Bob: That just seems unnecessary. Robotic Bestiality... Not my cup of tea.
Amand-r: Not when it's Jack. It's like it HAS TO BE DONE BECAUSE IT'S THERE.
Pornsultant Bob: Only for Organic Life. Kinda.
Amand-r: INTERSPECIES...ROBOTICA?
Pornsultant Bob: If Robotica is a legitimate form of porn, than so is an inflatable girlfriend.
Amand-r: YOU MEAN THEY AREN'T?
Pornsultant Bob: Not really.
Amand-r: Next you'll be telling me that there's no such thing as the donkey show.

2. Yesterday, misswinterhill said that I was squee anthropomorphised, so feel free to think of me as that.

3. Thanks for the nice words yesterday, mah peepes (I spelled that Samuel Pepys style—YE OLD PEEPES.)

4. So last night sthayashi, the delectable E, and another friend, we'll call him Clyde, came over for dinner and drinking. Clyde is not with our mad drinking skills, as you can see on the POST IT NOTE:





Don’t be afraid, because the swords are PVC piping or fiberglass rods with foam on them. THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT CERTAIN PEEPES CANNOT SMACK UP YOUR BOOBS AND IT WON'T HURT. THANKS, DUDE.


Yeah, because my badass overalls aren't the best things to fight in.

Me: Hai did I tell you my underpants have monkeys on them?
Sthayashi: Uh.
Me: Look. I'll show you—
Sthayashi: O_o.
Me: (scores hit) I WIN! I WIN!


UNDERPANTS=PROFIT.


Then I found Tianyu's shield in the basement. I like to think of all the cat hair on it as a special charm, as sthayashi is allergic to cat hair. Alas, that shield is awesome, but my mad skillz were not.


LASER EYES, MAN. WATCH OUT STHAYASHI.

Vivi had a special love for the weaponry



She got her Braveheart on.

Also: I did not teach her this, and neither of us screamed "DIE" at each other before we went in for the kill. We have all decided that Viv is genetically BRED TO KILL, LIKE JET LI.

Eventually, Clyde, who is a wuss and fell asleep after a can of Fosters, woke up and came outside, where he was cajoled into fighting.



HE SO KICKED UR ASS. Also, WTF WITH THE WRIST ACTION, DUDE?

E. jumped in and she kicked my ass, and then I kicked her ass, and then she and sthayashi soundly performed mutual arse kicking. Then it was time for chips and beer. Well, more beer.

5. I watched the Dead Like Me movie Friday night. I really really liked it. I mist be the only one. Thoughts later.

6. I have to get my fingers to work this morning. Right now they feel like they're made out of gummi worms. Fuck.

Comments

[kimuro.livejournal.com]

If Robotica is a legitimate form of porn, than so is an inflatable girlfriend

These Lawless Worlds #1: The Love Machine by Jarrod Comstock.

A space-faring circuit judge presides over a case of a robot killing all three technicians on-board a surveillance satellite. The defense was that the robot in question was raped and therefore not responsible for "her" actions. Meanwhile, a rebel leader is trying to use the incident to overthrow the repressive, totalitarian world government.

Silver-Metal Lover by Tanith Lee
Lonely woman falls in love with robot programmed to romance her.

Any number of Data fics and fanfics not to mention hentai Japanese manga and anime.

Conclusion, robotica is a legitimate form of porn.

(and I definitely would do Data!)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

AHAAHAHAHA SEE BOB. I WAS SO RIGHT. HE CAN BITE ME.

I WIN.

[kimuro.livejournal.com]

did you hear the one about the teen boy visiting the summer at his uncles dairy farm? One day, said uncle comes into the barn and find the boy using one of the attachments to the milking machine for ...umm... carnal purposes.

The boy is hideously embarassed but all the uncle says is "Hope you're right horny boy. That there machine is set for 3 gallons."

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

LOLOR5. OH GOD BAD KINGPIN FLASHBACKS.

[cyprinella]

♥!

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

♥ back!

[crowie.livejournal.com]

Drunken swordfighting can be utterly made of win. As long as the swords are either foam or the people involved really know what they're doing.

I don't recommend drunken sword fighting with wooden practice swords/sticks if you're barelegged in a skirt though. That shit can hurt.

Also I love the look of utter glee you can get on the faces of little girls when you hand them swords. Looks like your kidlet very much delivered :)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I don't use metal or wood. I like the rough an tumble of using the foam. Sthayashi is way better than I am. He is FOW for putting up with me last night.

It was funny, she knew what to do with it right away. SWORDS! THAT'S RIGHT, MY GIRL!

[crowie.livejournal.com]

I've been doing 'historical western martial arts' for years now (although with months and months of dropping out regularily so I'm somewhat rusty atm, I've just started going to class regularly again). So I play with wooden training weapons all the time and I've fenced a bunch with metal ones too.

Pictorial evidence: Me doing a sword demo at Alnwick castle with my teacher. I don't train in longsword though, those are just too brutish in metal for me, heh..

Basically I've pretty much always had a thing for swords, part of what drew me into HL way back when.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I remember you being a hard core girl. That pic is sweet. Swords were what drew my husband to HL. Okay, me too, I admit.

I just suck really hard. I telegraph and also I don't practice. Oh and also I don't give a shit. That's why I do it drunk! I need to do it more.

[crowie.livejournal.com]

It's ok to be rubbish at stuff. I'm well under the 10k hours plus it takes to get properly good at sword fighting for example. That's not relevant though because if you're having fun, you're doing it right y/y?

And on that account you definitely succeed DRUNKEN FOAMSWORDING FTW

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

HAAAHAHA, AT LEAST IT'S NOT LIKE NERF SWORDS. THESE GUYS KICK MY ASS ALL THE TIME (http://www.dagorhir.com/)

[lionessvalenti.livejournal.com]

So... did your underpants have monkeys on them, or were you just saying that to win the fight? I'm genuinely curious. :)

Dude, that video is win. Your kid is win.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

NO THEY SRSLY HAD MONKEYS ON THEM.

DIEEEEEEEEEEEE! DIEEEEEEEEEEE! WTF, KID.

[smirnoffmule.livejournal.com]

I love the sound of mommy approving of the extreme violence. "Excellent!" "Excellent!" I so want to come to your parties.

Also I missed the chance to say nice things last night because I was absent from the internets (I had a note) so here's some nice things now. You may totally eat one of my tootsie pops. blue_fjords will probably try to wrestle you to the ground, so be sure to say I said you could (then let her wrestle you anyway, it'll be fun).

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

COME ON. VIOLENCE IS THE BEST WAY TO SOLVE ISSUES. HAVEN'T WE LEARNED ANYTHING FROM HISTORY?

I WANT TO SEE YOUR NOTE. WAS IT STAMPED APPROVED?

I will save every tootsie pop for you. Save it like my virginit--ohwait.

[smirnoffmule.livejournal.com]

It was stamped TORCHWOOD. Or SWINE FLU, I forget which. It might even have been GOTTA CATCH EM ALL (INCLUDING SWINE FLU).

ohwait indeed. I'm saving it all for you, baby. And also I'm going to give you chocolate to bring back to our wrestling buddy. I might even let you have some of that too (she spurned my lemon sherberts, though, can you BELIEVE?)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

1. MINE WAS STAMPED 'GET DRUNK BIATCH.'

2. Who would spurn lemon sherberts? WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING? Only a master of evil, Darth.

[smirnoffmule.livejournal.com]

Darth Mule.

I'll get you some sherbert lemons. You can be Dumbledore.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

YOU HAVE CAST ME IN SO MANY ROLES.

You know, I have an image of Deadpool, punching someone in the face all shoriyuken style, screaming, "ALAS, EARWAX!"

[smirnoffmule.livejournal.com]

You KNOW Deadpool is an HP fan. He camped out at midnight for every new book release.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Deadpool secretly is a Harmoanian.

[sivatheminty.livejournal.com]

I think I would have been happier with it if Daisy was Daisy. The new girl had no style.....no class...

btw, video = win

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think the only parts that I really didn't like were Daisy (because this one looked like the poor man's Maggie Gyllenhall) and the way they ended up dealing with Cameron. Roxy and Mason had stellar dialogue, Mason had character growth, and the George plot lines (with Delores and the cat, and Reggie and her comatose sekrit bf) were just spot on. And in the end? The post it's falling from the sky? I bet you any money George is Rube's replacement. That works for me so hard as series closure. SO HARD. IT COMES FULL FUCKING CIRCLE.

I WANT TO FIC IT.

[sivatheminty.livejournal.com]

DOOO IIIIT

Yeah I'm almost certain that she's his replacement. The only issue I had with the Reggie plot line, was the whole memory loss deal if you attempted to talk with your family about who you were. But eh, it's a minor detail, as they never brought it up again after the first incident.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I actually thought that was pretty much gone, because George certainly talks to her mom in the seasons (S1?). I always thought that was kind of retarded, and they sort of skirted it for when Rube's daughter is dying in the nursing home.

[sivatheminty.livejournal.com]

I believe you were able to talk to relatives, but you just couldn't tell them who you were or you would risk losing memories if your past. Either way they ditched it, which I'm ok with because it improved the storyline.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, agreed. I can ignore that shitty episode.

[kel-reiley.livejournal.com]

i liked the movie
though i'd have preferred more of the series

[sthayashi.livejournal.com]

The best part is when Viola repeats "Excellent" after you say it.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

TRUFAX.