Torchwood, COE, Episode One

[amand_r]

Blow by blow, baby:

1. Maybe it's because I'm a young (also smoking hott) mother, but that whole opening sequence with the kids? It scared the ever-loving shit out of me. (Later when they started screaming, I had to stop the film because I was crying.)
2. JACK AND IANTO ARE THE WORST ACTORS EVER.
3. "Does that look human to you? No it does not." OH JB THAT MAY HAVE BEEN YOUR BEST DELIVERY EVER.
4. I LOVE YOU RUPESH. JACK SHOULD HIRE YOUR ASS.

~then I stopped for coffee. No for srs.~

5. MARTHA IS ON HER HONEYMOON! WAY TO GO, HART TOM!
6. "I hate the word 'couple'." "Me too." ::SAD IANTO PANDA FACE::
7. GWEN. I love your freckles.
8. THE SUICIDES. THE SUICIDES. THIS IS A FIC PLACE MARKER RIGHT THE FUCK HERE.
9. When Mr. Decker walked into the Home Office, I thought it was Leo McGarry for a moment.
10. Gwen and Rhys, your house will be fantastic. Also, Gwen's little "I'm going to England" speech KILLED ME DED.
11. Okay, I'm just going to say it. This couple shit they keep throwing about? It's getting the fuck old.
12. Oh, Alice. ALICE. ♥ Also, that was a beautifully frank conversation. Really, I think JB did a great job there.
13. "Susan said he was GORgeous. Like a FILM star. Like and EScort." I just loved the WAY she said it. She was totally ribbing him like the whole time. I love Rhiannon.
14. SOMEONE JACKED THE SUV. THIS WAS MY FAVORITE MOMENT IN THE WHOLE BLOODY THING. THROW A BRICK AT THEM! How much do you wanna to bet that the car is going to reappear at a very useful and possibly humorous moment? That's what I'd do.
15. GO GO GWEN. GO GO GADGET GIZMO.
16. The foley work in the Gwen-Clem interview was great.
17. NO RUPESH. NO. NO. NO, RUPESH, OH NO. (STATEMENT 4 REDACTED)
18. "Would now be a good time to tell you I lost the car?" Haaahahahaaahaha ILU IANTO.
19. OH SHITBEARS.

That is all I got. I guess if you tried to talk to me about it, I'd answer, but it might just be SHITBEARS. SHITBEARS.

YEAH I WAS SPOILED, BUT THAT DIDN'T STOP ME FROM SAYING, 'OH SHITBEARS'.

edit: That conversation should have gone like this:

Ianto: Would now be a good time to tell you I lost the car?
Jack: You what?
Ianto: (mumbles) I lost the car.
Jack: Jesus! At least tell me that you threw a brick at it!

Comments

[earthly-gnome.livejournal.com]

Even as a non-parental unit, those early scenes with the kids gave me chills.

Why was there no numeric for 'I'll survive anything'???

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

BECAUSE IT IS OBVIOUS JACK WILL SURVIVE ANYTHING.

AS LONG AS HE KNOWS HOW TO LOVE (WITH HIS COCK, NOT AS A COUPLE. HE HATES THE WORD 'COUPLE' BECAUSE IT ONLY MEANS TWO) HE KNOWS HE'LL BE ALIVE.

EVEN DONNA SUMMER KNOWS THAT.

[spiderine.livejournal.com]

OH SHITBEARS.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I AM NOT EVEN JOKING.

[rm.livejournal.com]

SHITBEARS IS HILARORIOUS AND I CAN"T STOP LAUGHING

9. When Mr. Decker walked into the Home Office, I thought it was Leo McGarry for a moment.

ME TOO!

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

IT'S JUST FUN TO SAY AND IT SUMS UP HOW I FEEL: SHITBEARS.

Srsly, I almost went, "Isn't John Spenser dead?" It was the lope and the set of his mouth. His pursed lip thing. I think Kristen Chenoweth said that was his "smirk". It was so him. BRITISH LEO.

[51stcenturyfox.livejournal.com]

OH SHITBEARS.

I am with you on the freckles. I love them so. Gwen!freckles!

So freckly, so Welsh, so sexy.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

She is one hot mama!

[tardistenantsue.livejournal.com]

Second on the kid thing. Worse by the fact that one of mine (the one who things he's a cyberman as well) has been stopping at random times and staring at us. He thinks it's funny.

I agree with all your points and, unitl my Patelyne showed up, I was a bit in fear of how I would react. I had already cired and was unable to talk by the end - and for those who know me - THAT IS WEIRD. As weird as kids who stop at the same time all over the world.

My simple review? Is it tomorrow yet?

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

She's not even lying! Quiet!Sue is odd like frozen screaming chanting children (I'M NEVER HAVING KIDS NOW!!)

[fajrdrako.livejournal.com]

JACK AND IANTO ARE THE WORST ACTORS EVER

Oh, yes, but so very, very cute with their hammy act!

I LOVE YOU RUPESH. JACK SHOULD HIRE YOUR ASS.

I wish.

I think JB did a great job there.

He was breaking my heart in that scene.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

IT WAS IANTO'S FAKE GRIEF THAT SET ME OFF. LOLOR5.

[mrsalemp.livejournal.com]

6. "I hate the word 'couple'." "Me too." ::SAD IANTO PANDA FACE::

I wanted to hug him!!

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I WAS LIKE, "I WILL BE YOUR PLUS ONE, IANTO. I HAVE THIS STRAP ON."

[pogrebin.livejournal.com]

OK, OK. I could not bring myself to do one of these posts but, in short order

1) RUPESH, NOOOO. I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING. YOU BASTARDS. WHAT A WASTE OF SEXY INDIAN DOCTOR ARSE, EVEN IF HE DOES FAILY MCFAILERSON AT PRONOUNCING HIS OWN LAST NAME!
2) GWEN "I'VE GOT ALL MY SHOTS" COOPER. WELSH PRIDE, YO. AND IN GENERAL, THAT WHOLE PHONE CONVO WITH RHYS
3) "BRAVE OLD HEART". THE CHUCKLEBROTHERS. OH, BOYS.
4) RE: YOUR NUMBER 11 --> THE SHOW IS TELLING US THAT JACK AND IANTO DEFINING THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS GOING TO BE A RUNNING THEME. BY TELLING THAT TO US. REPEATEDLY. (the sad part is, I am ok with this as long as I get to keep seeing Ianto's silly woobie face of woobie angst!!!!! Itissocute)
5) IANTO'S TOP SEKRIT ALIEN HUNTING SUV GOT STOLEN BY SOME KIDS IN THE MOST LOLARIOUS SCENE EVARRRR.
6) "Did they kill you too?" "Yeah." *Ianto: hugs* [most hilarious but also awesome response to your partner's death, check.]
7) JACK. IANTO. INVISIBLE LIFT. SNOGGING. EXPLODING. <---- it reduces me to single capslocky words. YARGH.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

1. INORITE? HE WAS SO HOT. THE HOTT ONES ARE ALWAYS EVIL OHWAIT.
4. I just, Jesus christ, man, get over the couple thing. Was this written by a man? It feels like it was written by a man.
5. THROW A BRICK AT THEM!
6. THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN MY RESPONSE, SO STFU.

OMG THAT KISS WAS NOT REMOTELY LONG ENOUGH.

[blue-fjords.livejournal.com]

When Mr. Decker walked into the Home Office, I thought it was Leo McGarry for a moment.

Dude, I didn't even watch that show, and I did a massive double take!

"Would now be a good time to tell you I lost the car?" Haaahahahaaahaha ILU IANTO.

LMAO.

I really, really enjoyed that and am massively looking forward to more. More super beautiful, funny, caring, competent Gwen. More kisses between Jack & Ianto. More of each w/ their families. Or, hey, they could all go on holiday together and leave Gwen & Rhys in charge of the Rift. Rhys would be a kick-ass assistant to Gwen!

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I love competent Gwen. LOVE LOVE LOVE.

[phaetonschariot.livejournal.com]

13. "Susan said he was GORgeous. Like a FILM star. Like and EScort." I just loved the WAY she said it. She was totally ribbing him like the whole time. I love Rhiannon.

I just re-watched this and I find it hilarious that he followed this with "He's my boss" and before he was all "I'm busy on Saturday" and she's like "civil servants don't work on Saturdays" and I TOTALLY WANT HER TO NOW THINK HER ICKLE BROTHER IS A MALE ESCORT.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I like when he just kind of cuts across with, "He is handsome."

[darthhellokitty.livejournal.com]

I am laughing at your Torchwood Comfort Food, because I ate 16 Pixie Stix while watching the show.

I am now insane.

I'm thinking of just going to bed now and setting the alarm for tomorrow afternoon when the next episode hits the Internets.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I KNOW. JESUS.

[bethcarielle.livejournal.com]

2. JACK AND IANTO ARE THE WORST ACTORS EVER.

This killed me. Ianto was horrid.

10. Gwen and Rhys, your house will be fantastic. Also, Gwen's little "I'm going to England" speech KILLED ME DED.

I had to pause the epi to LOL for this.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Oh Gwen, you stab those English with mockety mock.

[lefaym.livejournal.com]

Eve Myles definitely gets the good acting award for this episode. Clem was brilliant.

Jack and Ianto... didn't quite hit the right note, although the snog was gorgeous.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think Gwen won Episode One.

I think we need more Jack/Ianto. Just to be sure. I think they played about with the argument too much.

[dani_the_girl]

I wish Gwen would stick to her "No, actually I don't want a family right now" guns. Why shouldn't she, after all?

I laughed at some many of the wrong places in this episode. Torchwood, you FAIL at being sekrit :D

[annemjw.livejournal.com]

I really really hope this isn't true, but right at the end of the episode my brain went: 'Wait, sacrifices, right? So maybe... she won't, you know, stay pregnant. Umm'.

Which I don't want to happen! But! Totally possible.

just here to add nothing to the conversation ;)

[curriejean.livejournal.com]

This is like the best thread (series of threads?) on the internet.

Re: just here to add nothing to the conversation ;)

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Haahahahaha THERE WILL BE MOAR.

[smirnoffmule.livejournal.com]

Tell me, are shitbears a bit like gummibears?

Ianto: Would now be a good time to tell you I lost the car?
Jack: You what?
Ianto: (mumbles) I lost the car.
Jack: Jesus! At least tell me that you threw a brick at it!

WIN.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

As I said elsewhere, my love of the ep was only compounded my the many moments in which I could morph Jack into A_CJ in my head. That was one of many.

[debitha.livejournal.com]

1. The screaming kids was way the fuck creepy. Kudos to them for that.

10. For serious, it costs £5.40 to get into Wales by the Severn Bridge (and if you get in the wrong line at the bridge you might have to pay it in COINS (not that this has ever happened to me. *cough*)), but it's free to leave, baby.

13. His sister was so much fun. That whole conversation ("You just disappeared after Dad died. Was it something I did?" OUCH!) was so well done.

14. I wonder where the Ask_SUV was parked. I'm not that far from Cardiff. I could get the train and go jack it. It's not like they need it anymore...

[annemjw.livejournal.com]

Jesus! At least tell me that you threw a brick at it!

Ahahahahaha, brb, LOLing forever.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

Haahahahaha. Sadly, for most of tis episode, all I saw was A_CJ.

[sivatheminty.livejournal.com]

That reminds me of the care packages I used to send from the candy store...god I miss that place :)

So...what is this Torchwood about and should I start watching it?

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

OMG YES YOU SHOULD WATCH IT.

[acchikocchi.livejournal.com]

Here by way of friendsfriends and just wanted to say -

9. When Mr. Decker walked into the Home Office, I thought it was Leo McGarry for a moment.

I said the exact same thing to my friend and she thought I was crazy. THE SWEET TASTE OF VINDICATION, HA.

[amand-r.livejournal.com]

I think rm thought so too.